The irony of being an adult is that juggling demands from our family, job, pets etc. is in reality a gift to be cherished….. However, it can sometimes still feel like a constant overwhelming grind, leaving little time for us as individuals.
On top of that for some reason, I tend to add my downtime and hobbies to my ever-increasing list of things to do, which ironically stresses me out further.
Brains are weird.
When I finally get past the adulting backlog and I sit down at the hobby desk, the most frustrating thing is that I do not have the brain space to figure out what I want to do!
The last month has been particularly challenging for me with a change in my day job in a highly competitive market, as well as both dogs being very ill for completely separate reasons.
When you write it down, it does not seem that much. But it can still feel all-consuming at the time can’t it?
But now I have been offered a job which I am looking forward to starting and both dogs have treatment plans from the vets which are going well.
Finally, my brain has that little bit of capacity back to think about painting, simply for the fun of it.
But what to paint?
The feeling of despair, like staring at a blank page at the start of an essay assignment in school threatens to be too much.
“Come on Jon…. fight the urge to give up and go make a brew… Just pick something!”
Casting an eye over the pile of resin and grey plastic, I decided on painting “Dark Strider” a character from my expanding Warhammer 40k Tau army.
The lore behind this guy is very cool. He is almost like a Tau version of Maverick from Top Gun. He “accidentally” miss hears orders due to comms failure, known as one of the empire’s finest, yet refuses to take a promotion and despite his best efforts, refuses to die.
Yeah, I can do something with this…
As Dark Strider is a distinguished Path Finder commander, I decide to paint him in a camouflage scheme so that he ties in with the rest of the Pathfinders in my collection. But I should do something a bit special for this one and I also want to improve on painting Tau faces and skin tones.
So I go to work.
It feels like an age since I picked up a paintbrush like this and takes a while to get back in the groove. But as it comes together it feels so good.
One thing I learned from this period is that sometimes life happens and other things take priority.
We should prioritise self-care and our regen time. But even if you would normally find it relaxing, if you do not have the brain space for painting the sea of grey plastic, then simply slobbing in front of the TV is good enough for now.
One of the joys of modelling is that it will be ready whenever you are. So relax, do not stress and enjoy that feeling of a project as and when you are ready.